Me: Excuse me? Do you know if you have...
MInci: (into mobile) Just a sec. May I help you?
Me: Oh. MInci. Hi. I haven't seen you for quite a while.
MInci: (silent gaze)
Me:Your name tag...
MInci: I added an extra "i".
Me: .... Okay then. I'm looking for a new lip gloss since they discontinued my favorite, the Lip Glaze. Do you have one that would be similar?
MIncii: That Lip Glaze has been gone for.e.ver. Lots of the old clients liked that one though.
Me: Right. Well, are any of the new glosses anything like it?
Mincii: Gawd, hope not! (into mobile) Just a sec.
Me: So no gloss then?
Mincii: Oooh, we have this aMAZing Lip ShimmerPoppyPlumpo!! Want to try? You look like you'd use the Gouge Your Eyes Out pink with XX plumpo.
Me: Well, I'm not sure I want...
Mincii: But we're out of those. Let me see if we have a sample somewhere.
Me: That's okay, I don't need a sample... Minci? MInci, really. No need to crawl around under...
MIncii: I found my old name tag!
Me: And there you go. I suppose now you could switch back and forth? Keep your customers guessing.
Mincii: (silent gaze)
Me: And I'm guessing you didn't find a sample?
MIncii: (into mobile) Just a sec.
Me: All right then. How about an eyebrow pencil? I need one of those.
Mincii: Oooh, you DO! That happens when you get old. Poof. Gone.
Me: *sigh* If you have this one in a light brown I'll take one, please.
MIncii: You mean the Hazy Scorched Earth color? We're out of those.
Me: Oh, I suppose the supply chain...
MIncii: We don't sell those at this counter. I bet they have them in Jewelry. (into mobile) Just a sec.