(They aren't listening to a thing I'm saying. They all seem so distracted.)
Me: And for my next trick I will balance this chair on my head while I dance naked in a pile of flaming rags.
(Nothing. Absolutely nothing. What is with them today?)
Me: Okay, what is with all of you today?
Student R: Oh, we're sorry! We've been watching a spider go up and down from the ceiling. And as you move around, sometimes you're standing under it and sometimes you're not.
Me: Fabulous. A spider is more interesting than I am today.
Student C: No problem. We can't see it anymore.
Me: Good! Hopefully now....
Student J: Because it's in your hair.